tremdagenham – Page 12 – TREM Marks Gate

God’s Word – The Seed Of His Blessing

A true revelation of God’s Word is the single most important element of a victorious Christian life. There are a total of forty-four verses in the New Testament where the Greek word was translated ‘seed’. To conceive and give birth to the miracles you need, you must first plant God’s Word like a seed in your heart. There has only been one virgin birth, and the birth of your miracle won’t be the second.

I constantly meet Christians who pray and believe for God’s intervention in their lives, but remain frustrated with the results. It’s because they are missing the seeds of conception; they just don’t know God’s Word. In Mark 4, the Lord taught three parables which illustrate that the Word is to the Kingdom of God what a natural seed is to a harvest. The first of these parables, the story of the sower, is the key to unlocking all the Word of God (Mark 4:13). Our hearts were created by God to bring forth fruit when His Word is planted in them.

Just as a seed has to remain in the ground over time to germinate, so the Word of God has to abide in us. I cannot tell you strongly enough how important it is that you know God’s Word and that you plant the seed of His Word in your heart long before you need the fruit of the harvest. It could mean the difference between prosperity and poverty, or even life and death. So, make this year your personal Year of the Bible and build a sure foundation in your own life. It will be the best decision you have ever made and you will be an OVER COMER.

This article was contributed by iamsheunski@yahoo.com

My Blessing

My blessing is not about repayment
of debt I owe you
For I owe no man
All that you have and all that you are
Is all because of Me

My blessing is not about you
It’s simply a display of My power
Showing forth through you My awesomeness
For without Me, you can do nothing
All you are is because of Me

My blessing is not about your tears
For tears never move Me
My compassion is not a response to tears
Rather it is a response to faith
For heart to heart connection is faith communing with Me

So be grateful everyday
Be joyful all the time
Not for what you have received
Or what you have experienced
It’s all about Me at work in you

Poem by Rev Oluwayomi Uteh

Stranded at the Bank

Bro Peter and Sis Pat Pataki (The Pees) were very religious people. They worshipped mammon though they knew it not. Neither would they believe it even if they were told. They were loved and respected by all and sundry in the church, in their groups and in the society. They enjoyed the favour of God and man. They were highly sought-after. They knew how to reach out to others, exclusively, brethren who could do without it.

When Bro. Udoma, Citibank’s company secretary, took celebrated golden voiced newscaster, Efe Asika to the altar, they footed the reception bill; when Deacon John Amana, Chairman of the Nigeria Liquefied and Natural Gas Company (NLNG) turned 52, they threw him a lavish bash at the Golden Gate Restaurant Ikoyi. Also, when the heir apparent to the shipping magnate, Isiguzo Isiguzor, Bro. Dickson dedicated his first son, Joshua, they were “overjoyed” at what God had done for him, and the Pees gave him and his elegant wife, a hundred thousand naira.

They were among the movers and shakers of not only their church but the society at large. They were in the timber business, exporting timber to Italy and other overseas countries. Neither Bro. Peter nor Sis. Pat had much education having stopped at Secondary School level but, being much travelled, they had become very cultured and because of the exposure, could hang out with the very learned and the very wealthy as well.

They had a trained eye to spot lack, no matter how faint in the life of the brethren. They usually made themselves scarce if they detected a brother or a sister was in need. You will seek them, you will not find them; you will pursue them with pleasant words but they would not have the time to attend to you. It was nothing to them, to ignore a brother in need, including his greeting or walk past such a person without acknowledging his presence no matter how well they knew him or her. They expected every good brother and sister to be abreast with fashion.

They were a very fashion-conscious couple, collecting labels from world capitals like Rome, Milan, Paris, New York, London, etc. Sis. Pee arranged her clothes according to their labels: Fendi, Channel, YSL, etc. Her wardrobe had a problem – overstuffing; for clothes she wore twenty years ago were still struggling for space with those of five, to two years and two weeks ago. Whenever she thought of giving them out, she shuddered, for it would be like casting pearls at swine as they rightly said. The brethren who needed clothes were mainly ignorant folks. Her husband too would not think of giving out any of his handmade suits as he often said that his outfits were not meant for ordinary employees of labour, but for MDs and CEOs and Employers of labour. The Pees’ favourite saying was that they were collectors: they collected houses, cars and outfits.

One night, Bro. Pee had a dream; he was in a situation that looked strangely familiar. A brother was sick unto death and people were pleading with somebody he could not see to have mercy with the brother and this person refused. After watching for some time, Bro. Pee turned away but as he did, he was looking into another place, an unfamiliar setting, somebody was seated on a throne and others surrounded him. Bro. Pee heard what they were saying. One standing said, “I have checked his bank account Sir, I’m afraid it is empty.”
The one who was sitting said, “Check very well, no matter how small you find we’ll use it for he is a son and you cannot throw away your son.”
The one standing shook his head regrettably. “Sir,” he answered mournfully, “he is bankrupt. He has never given sacrificially and he has never given to anyone who needed it.”

There was silence. The atmosphere was thick with sadness. Then as Bro. Pee watched, three people stepped forward and bowed down to the one on the throne and said they would love to go and help the person in question. They were permitted to. And Pee woke up. When he shared it with his wife, she said, “Well, let’s just pray that no poor person who has no money to treat himself will fall sick, that is all.” So, they prayed, asking God to protect all the poor brethren in the church lest any fell sick. And they believed God for prayer answered.

Wednesday, after service, Bro. Pee and his wife were sitting in their newly-acquired Prado Jeep chatting with one of the very fashionable sisters in the church. They knew not what she did for a living but she was always turning up to church elegantly dressed. She was one of their many “good” friends. As they were chatting with her, Sis. Pee’s eyes were travelling all over her noting the gold chain she wore around her neck, the Gucci bag and the Christian Dior blouse then, a figure sauntered out of the shadows towards them breaking Sis. Pee’s concentration. She stopped briefly to take in the fellow: somebody unfamiliar and obviously poor. She looked away.

The figure stood there hesitantly and then moved to the side of Bro. Pee. He approached him cautiously and said he needed money for food and transportation. “Go to welfare office,” Bro. Pee said curtly. “What is that?” asked his wife. He told her. “Let him go to welfare office, now!” she snapped impatiently. “Church people are too lazy. They will not work. That’s how they drive away people from the house of the Lord,” Bro. Pee said regrettably. “What is it?” The elegant sister asked. They told her. She reached into her bag and calling out to the figure, handed him some cash. He took it and thanked her and disappeared into the shadows again. “You know why I don’t like giving this people anything?” Bro. Pee asked, “Tomorrow, when I’m not there what will they do?” The wife nodded. “O – Oho!” she cried in agreement. The elegant sister considered it briefly and nodded somehow in disagreement.

On Saturday, as the women met, the angels were physically present in that meeting. They were the angels that came to help the Patakis. They discussed love and the women leader gave women opportunity to share their views. Sis. Pee stood and shared her view for thirty minutes. Everybody listened with rapt attention, all the while, smiling and nodding their heads in absolute agreement with her. When she finished, a thunderous ovation followed her contribution. Then, a sister who looked malnourished and badly dressed raised her hand. She wanted to share, to make a contribution, the women leader ignored her and looked around for worthier sisters. There were none. Then she grudgingly gave the obviously needy sister opportunity. But she was impatient with her, telling her to make it very brief as there was no more time. The sister shared. No one listened, no one heard. They stared at her disinterestedly. Finished, she sat down feeling very small. She was one of the three angels.

After the meeting, she went to Sis Pee to ask for a lift. “To where?” Sis. Pee asked peeved. “Anywhere along the road,” the badly dressed sister said self-consciously, clutching an urchin with her right hand. “I’m sorry my car cannot take more than two people. The shaft is bad. So, it’s only me and my driver that can sit in it,” Sis. Pee replied peevishly.
“Please sister,” the woman pleaded, “the sun is too hot and I don’t have transport money; my little girl…”
All fell on deaf ears.

Recently, the Pees had been seeing a brother who was always standing with a heavily pregnant woman by his side near their house. And they knew that if they lived in their neighbourhood, it must be in somebody’s Boy’s Quarters for obviously, they could not afford the houses in that area. So, the Pees would grudgingly exchange waves with them without offering them lifts: their three little children occupied the back seat. But surprisingly, when they got to the church, they would see the couple already there and they would exchange waves again while they hurry past.

One day, they saw the brother there alone. In the church, he approached them. When they saw him coming, they suspected his mission but could not run away because the only exit was the one the brother was using. They exercised long suffering as they patiently endured until the brother accosted them and made known his mission. His wife had delivered their baby through a caesarean operation. He needed sixty thousand naira.

“What cell fellowship do you belong to Bro?” The Pees asked him. He told them. “Are you in the men’s group? Which one, Nehemiah or Joshua?” Bro. Pee asked him. “Bro, you have to go to the welfare office!” Sis. Pee said exasperated. She was disgusted and angry. These poor brethren are all over the place now. They will not allow decent folk to worship God in peace! To the needy brother she continued, “Nobody has that kind of money to give out. We all have our own personal problems. It’s God that’s been helping us.” Bro, my wife will look for some used baby things to send to you. But, please, do as she said, go to the welfare office. I’m sure they will help you. Okay Bro, God bless you!” Bro. Pee said, nicely. “Yes, I’ll get the baby some used things. Greet madam for me and please, take it easy o.”
The brother turned and walked away in confusion. The Pees escaped. They did not see the brother again. The angles had completed their assignment.

“People should go and look for something to do. All these begging and borrowing must stop in the house of God. They’re desecrating God’s temple.”
“I think it’s laziness,” his wife replied. That is right.
As Bro. Pee finished supper, his steward handed him his glass of freshly squeezed orange juice. He took a long drink and belched. It smelled like a fart. He faintly wondered why. But, there was good news on CNN. George W. Bush was getting ready to move into Capitol Hill while Clinton was moving out. He forgot all about it. But as he got up to follow his wife to pray with their children before they slept he felt nausea. He wondered why. The feeling came on very strong. He went into the guest toilet and vomited: His wife fussed all over him blaming it on the fish the steward cooked and giving him crackers biscuits to chew explaining how dry things stopped vomiting. But by morning Bro. Pee knew he was sick.

Probably malaria, he said. No, typhoid, the family doctor told him. They treated him for typhoid but to no avail. Each time he belched, it smelled like fart. He mentioned it to his doctor. The doctor looked worried and invited him for some tests. Some days later, the doctor stopped by at his house, he wore a heavy mien, like an undertaker. When the Pees saw him, they knew something was wrong. He told them, renal failure. Mr Pataki’s kidney had failed. “What?” screamed Sis. Pat. “He eats good food and doesn’t take alcohol. Aah, the devil is a liar. This is a joke. I refuse it; I reject it in Jesus Name. Hey, I say no to Satan…..” “Bro. Peter was too shocked to utter a word. Cold fingers of fear began to creep into his heart. His wife got up and started praying wildly. “I rebuke you, Satan. I rebuke sickness. I curse you in the Name of Jesus. I command you to die. Return to sender. Raboshkemamama….. Robozomoroboro Karakababa…”

In no time at all, Bro. Peter began to swell up with fluid retention. Treatment commenced immediately. He flew to England. He began to go through dialysis after dialysis. His brethren began to pray seriously for him especially his group in the men’s fellowship where he was very active. His condition deteriorated fast. His system rejected transplant after transplant so his only hope was dialysis. His pastor and his wife were heartbroken for the Patakis had been of great financial help to the church. Money began to run out. He was spending pounds per hour. They carried him from England, to France, to Switzerland; wherever an expert was said to be.

Soon, there was no more money to attend to business. All money was channelled into saving Bro. Pee’s life. Sis. Pat realised they were fighting a lost battle. Her beloved Pee was dying. She pawned off her jewels and sold off their properties. She began to lag behind in fashion. Y2K shoes came into fashion, she could not buy. Uglies’ followed, she could not afford them. New cars came out, they could not buy. New estates were built, they could not acquire houses. Men wore new suits – four buttons, six buttons, ten buttons, Bro. Peter was past caring. Their friends shied away from Sis. Pat now because she went around begging for money to keep her husband alive for he was barely living. When Sis. Pat spoke now, nobody clapped. She trekked often and used buses. Many brethren’s cars developed shaft problems so, no one helped her.

Their pastor and his wife embarked on a fast to seek God’s face concerning the Patakis. But their prayers seemed to be hitting flint rock. They persisted being people that hardly gave up. It was very difficult for them to break through in prayer. It was as if they were getting a ‘no answer’. They persisted, pleading the blood of the everlasting covenant and extending the fast and the prayer time. At long last, God gave his servant a Scripture, Psalm 41. They prayed more fervently, interceding for the Patakis. The Lord said to them, “Peter’s good deed account is empty. He never laid up any treasure. He gave where he would be applauded. He never loved my people. He treated those I shed my Blood for contemptuously. He loved mammon and worshipped him.”

They began to pray harder, standing in the gap. “You’re a God of mercy, what can be done to stop the evil?”
Finally, the Lord said, Ezekiel 18:32: for I have no pleasure in the death of he that sinneth but let him turn from his evil and live. They thanked God and worshipped Him and broke their fast.

Sister Pat was summoned. She came wearing old clothes, her face etched with pains; her palms hard and dry from doing house chores because they had no more maids. The pastor wondering where to begin; heard in his spirit, a dream, a dream. The pastor repeated what he heard … “Your husband had a dream, somebody sick?” Sister Pat squeezed her face in thought. “Tell us if you know,” he said.
She did. The pastor and his wife exchanged glances. He said to her, “That’s your husband.” He told her what the Lord said and gave her the scriptures. She broke down and cried repenting immediately. The shepherds prayed for her.

When she left, the pastor’s wife left the room to attend to something else. The pastor suddenly started as he felt a hand on his shoulders. He had no idea that someone else was in that room but he heard a voice, “Son, build me a compassionate army. Raise Me an army that will pay any prize to win souls into the kingdom and will pay any prize to ensure that the souls remain.” The pastor hastened to his knees and bowed down before the God of all the earth.

Sister Pat humbled and contrite fled home to her husband for he had been sent home to die. She shared everything with him and they repented and turned from their wicked ways. They began to give out the little they had left and not before long Bro. Pee had another dream. He went to the bank to draw money and he drew and drew – there was so much. He woke up, totally healed!

Deaconess Lechi Eke contributes her short stories from Lagos, Nigeria

Spread the Word, Share!

How To Get Money!

If you don’t know the Truth about Money, You won’t have more of it!

“And you shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free!” – John 8:32

Your limitation in life is the truth you know! What’s keeping you at the level you are, is the truth you know. Many people vocally express a desire to have more, to be more, to go further and achieve more, but without exposing yourself to the truth, you are bound by lies.

“The rich and the poor have one maker – God!” Prov 22:2.

God made men, but men by ignorance differentiate themselves. If you want to make more money, then you want to be exposed to the truth about money. The information we have, shapes our perception, configures our thinking, moulds our attitudes and predetermines our actions.

Know the truth, and it will set you FREE!

Here are two FREE Lessons

Wealth Operates on Laws, if you understand those laws and align yourself to them, you can get phenomenal results. As human beings, we were born without limitations, there was no boundary to what we could demand for, but as we grew, we learnt lack, and learnt to be reasonable. In these lessons we lost some of our intrinsic advantages. You need to learn these laws and their applications to get them back.

There is a process to financial freedom, if you know where you are going, and can evaluate where you are, you have taken the first step towards sure success. You need to understand the process and you need guidance. One of the best things that can happen to you this 2015 is for you to get a coach!

Second key lesson everyone needs in today’s economy is FINANCIAL INTELLIGENCE. You are not taught in school, and neither is any institution empowered to teach it. Married couples need it! Parents need it! Jobless people need it! Career people are hopeless without it. Don’t wait till things become bad before you make a move! Make the move today.

By Charles Ezeh

Excellence as a Lifestyle…

The root of the word Excellence is the phrase “to exceed”, or to go beyond the standard, to stand apart or to stand out. Other meanings are superiority, first class, eminently good.

Lifestyle implies a way of life – the habits, attitudes, tastes, moral standards of a person.

Therefore, a lifestyle of excellence speaks to exceeding as a way of life, going beyond the standard as a habit, having a first class attitude, having superior moral standards; as opposed to being an occasional visitor to the shrine of excellence. It speaks to a state of being – being an embodiment of all that is eminently good, a reflection and purveyor of high standards and a poster-child for excellent living.

Daniel 6:3 – 5 is the Scripture that identifies and enumerates all the qualities that made Daniel an excellent and exceptional personality. From that Scripture, we can note the following key phrases as marks of excellence against which to measure ourselves. Daniel:

Distinguished himself
Had exceptional qualities
Had no corruption found in him
Was trustworthy
Was not negligent
Had no basis for charges to be brought against him (except false ones)

Another Scripture we all love to default and allude to when praying for excellence, especially for our children, is Isaiah 11: 2 – 5. Again, the key words to note are:

An excellent spirit is equated to possession of the Spirit of God – the Holy Spirit of:
- Wisdom
- Understanding
- Counsel
- Power or Might
- Knowledge
- Fear of the Lord
- That delights in the fear of the Lord
- Judges not by sight
- Thus gives righteous judgement
- Does not take decisions based on hearing alone
- Thus takes just decisions and delivers justice
- Faithfulness, not falsehood or treachery

If I had to choose a word to describe all these attributes, it would be the word, Wholesome. Wholesomeness suggests a general well-being, an equilibrium/balance between our soul, spirit and body.

An excellent lifestyle is a wholesome way of life. Years ago, the buzz word in management was Total Quality (TQ). In a sense, TQ can be applied to this idea of an all-encompassing pursuit of excellence in all facets of life. It is not limited to academic or career pursuits, not limited to spiritual activities, not restricted to home life. It requires excellence in:

Your thoughts and speech
Your conduct
Your relationships
Your appearance (dressing and comportment)
Your vocation (academics, business, career)
And above all, excellence in the things of the Spirit

But, let me narrow things down to the following four areas:

Speech (and thoughts, by implication)
Performance (work, home and all other life endeavours)
Conduct
Leadership

In all of these, note that Excellence is essentially mastery over your natural impulses, which is also equivalent to self-discipline.

Excellence in Speech

James 3:2 – Anyone who does not err in what they say is perfect (or excellent), able to keep their whole body in check.

Unwholesome speech is NOT limited to the use of four-letter words (curses and coarse language). Lies, innuendos, half-truths, gossips, whisperings, rumour-mongering, malicious statements, slander, unsubstantiated claims and accusations, and all sorts of ill-will delivered by the power of the tongue – all qualify as unwholesome speech. The question is this – where is the mark of excellence in the life of someone who spews such things?

David, another striver after excellence declared plaintively in Psalm 141:3, “God, put a guard over my mouth and a watch over the door of my lips”.

Excellence in your thoughts translates to responsible and wholesome speech. There are people all over the place, including sadly, in church, who do not filter their thoughts before they become speech. They allow every little thing that drops into their heads to pop out of their mouths – no filtering, no mastery of their impulses, no logical sorting of their thoughts or words, no demonstrated ability for critical thinking; they are essentially lazy thinkers. To call them infantile would be an insult to children everywhere. These are people who apply no rigour in their lives. Excellence demands rigour.

Bishop used to say, “You cannot stop a bird from perching on your head (can`t stop a thought from dropping into your mind) but you sure can stop it from building a nest there (you can stop a thought from festering and developing into speech).

If you constantly spew poison from your mouth, it is reflection of a poisonous thought life and a poisonous personality, and clear evidence of a lack of excellence in you. We are admonished by the apostle Paul to take every thought captive in obedience to Christ.

Why this emphasis on thought and speech? In the earlier Scripture reference, Apostle James said if we do not err in speech, we do not err at all. He was on to something. He was cognizant of what the writer of Proverbs said eons ago – As a man thinketh in his heart, so is he. I will expand that to say, As a man thinketh in his heart, so he speaketh with his mouth and so is he.

Clean up your thought life and your speech and watch your life begin to transform into one of excellence.

Excellence in Performance

Let`s zero in on careers – it is often said, and rightly so, that it is the way you do someone else`s work that you would do yours, when the time comes. So this is also applicable to business endeavours.

You must choose to be the best you can be. Don`t be in the middle of the pack, be at its head.
Do more than enough to get by, commit to doing good work and going well beyond that which is just enough.

But note the following:

Ability is not enough to get you to your destiny. Excellence is what gets you there.
Excellence is not a skill but an attitude, a mind-set.
Excellence is in the details; develop excellence in little matters and you develop an excellent, prevailing attitude.
Excellence demands persistence, not a one-off effort.
It is a process but measured by results. Gone is the era of A for effort – excellence now gets measured in real terms viz. exceptional outputs/outcomes.
Excellence is a journey, perfection is the destination.

A quote by an IBM executive summarises this whole concept beautifully:

“There are countless ways of attaining greatness but any road to reaching ones maximum potential must be built on a bedrock of respect for individuals, a commitment to excellence and a rejection of mediocrity.“

Mediocrity is of course, ordinariness, second-rate ability, being average rather than being outstanding. And, every time you fail to choose excellence, mediocrity just shows up in its place by default. You do not have to consciously make mediocre choices to be a mediocre performer; failing to take the path of excellence would do it each and every time.

You will never attain to excellence with a poor attitude or bad character. How many times have you heard it said that ability or talent will get you to the top but it is character that keeps you there. I would even challenge that thought by stating that ability without character will no longer get you to the top.

From practical experience – while I am no expert on the subject, I do have a modest 23-year experience of having had the burden of managing peoples` performance through appraisals, promotion decisions and career development. Every career progression is marked by promotions – that is the way to climb the career ladder. Many Christians complain about being passed over for promotion, attributing it to a malicious boss, an unfair system or a spiritual problem. But I have found that most of us are our own worst enemies. While there are indeed the occasionally unfortunate cases of unmerited delays, those are the exception to the rule and are in fact, few and far between.

Many people are mediocre performers – just doing enough to get by, showing up and doing the minimum they can get away with and failing to address their competency gaps by developing their abilities and skills. Some actually believe they are doing a good job but have in fact set the bar too low for themselves thus consistently falling short of corporate or group expectations.

An exceptional performance requires you to meet deadlines, exceed targets and prove that you work for the organisation`s greater good.

Others who have ability and drive, have a very poor attitude.

In essence, brethren, you are not passed over or sidelined or discriminated against, you are simply not promotable. Why?

Promotion demands the ability to perform and deliver at the next higher level;
It requires a consistent track record of sustained good performance;
It requires you to be able to expand your scope, capability and to take on more responsibility and;
It implies that you are on track for a future leadership position (because if you keep climbing the career ladder, you will eventually get into leadership – in the event you do not exhibit necessary leadership qualities, your promotion will get stunted).

When you fail in any of these, you are not ready for a promotion, assuming the opportunity exists or a position opens up.

Now, still speaking of practical experience – in my current organisation (let`s assume that organisation is called TREM), there is a set of behaviours we call TREMWay behaviours and the bottom line is that you are expected not just to get results, but to get results the right way each and every time. What is interesting is how closely the list of behaviours aligns with the Isaiah 11 and Daniel 6 attributes of excellence – showing that Biblical principles still form the foundation of the best and most genuine secular pursuits.

Time and again, someone has been passed over for a promotion in spite of exceptional technical ability and performance because they have a bad attitude – they are said not to exhibit TREMWay behaviours and can therefore not be trusted with that next higher level appointment or assignment. It is concluded that they are well-placed at their current level – inevitably, a death knell for a promotion.

Such people are rude, disruptive, arrogant, refuse to play by corporate rules, are not good team players thus detracting from overall team performance, cannot get along with anyone, are contentious even when there is nothing to contend for – real rebels without a cause, can`t take or handle constructive feedback without taking it personal. Just generally impossible to work with without getting a headache. We call them High Maintenance and no one wants to work with them or supervise them, given the choice. Clearly, these are not marks of excellence or marks of a potential leader. And guess what happens when this sort is not promoted, they sulk and behave even worse; their performance suffers thus becoming a self-fulfilling prophecy of unpromotability.

The fact is that if you do excellent work naturally, intuitively and instinctively because you are committed to a life of excellence, even when you are seemingly not favoured or rewarded, you will still do excellent work by default, knowing that Excellence is its own reward.

And may I add that while in church, a bad attitude or a contentious character may be covered by grace, the laws of grace get suspended in the workplace unless God intervenes to activate them and even He expects His children to comport themselves as credible ambassadors of an excellent kingdom – He is not in the business of sponsoring or validating bad behaviour.

Excellence in Conduct

I think I might be stating the obvious when I talk about the need for excellence in our conduct. I am of the opinion that both Daniel 6 and Isaiah 11 summarise this concept very beautifully, with those lengthy lists of attributes. Again, I will default to the use of one word to capture the attributes that describe an excellent conduct. That word is Integrity.

What is Integrity? It is adherence to moral and ethical principles, soundness of moral character, uprightness, honesty, the state of being whole (see that word again?), being sound and unimpaired and being in perfect condition.

Judge for yourself whether or not you measure up or are even on the path to achieving excellence in your conduct.

Excellence in Leadership

As a leader, always choose excellence over popularity. In the short term, you may be unpopular or even disliked but over the longer term, you will earn respect as someone who rewards merit, is just and even-handed, committed to seeing those around him get better and is always willing to share the credit and the limelight, even if that respect is not universal. There will always be hold-outs; those who have signed on to a life of mediocrity will resent you for driving them too hard and will have nothing good to say about your style of leadership. But we can all take solace in the fact that our Lord who was perfect and sinless did not have universal acceptance either, not even among his closest associates, his team of twelve. Leadership is not a soap box for canvassing votes on popularity. It is first and foremost, a responsibility.

The moral authority of a leader to demand an excellent followership is his own personal commitment to excellence.

Every leader has been a follower once, therefore note that excellent followership is the foundation of your future leadership quality or the prerequisite to a future leadership marked by an exceptional standard.

A mediocre follower who by fair or foul means somehow eventually attains to leadership cannot go beyond the level of an even more mediocre leader. You cannot give what you do not have. What is more? As a leader, your shortcomings are even more glaring than when you were a mere follower. This is simply because you are going to wake up one day realising that you have been promoted beyond your competence. You may be able to talk the talk by bluffing (through the gift of gab) but if you cannot walk the talk, you will soon be found out. Examples abound both in the workplace and in church as witnessed by us all.

Now is the time to deal with the mediocrity inherent in your nature. And remember that Excellence is always a choice.

To tie all this together, because someone is liable to wonder how impossible the pursuit of excellence is – constantly seeking to excel in thoughts, speech, in conduct, in relationships, in business, in the workplace, as a mother, father, son, daughter and in the things of God.

This is precisely why it has to become a way of life. It is a lifestyle issue; just like sporadic dieting does not result in a healthy, nice physique, requiring that healthy eating becomes a lifestyle choice; so is anything that we intend to practice as second nature.

Excellence becomes who you are and what you are and it permeates every aspect of your life; without conscious effort of making individual choices in every circumstance over time. It would naturally colour your vision and all you do.

We are not Schizophrenics (with split personalities) –an angel in church and a monster out there; competent at work and slovenly at home. A lifestyle of excellence is a lifestyle of consistency. Every time we are faced with choices, let us determine to choose the path that leads to an excellent outcome until it becomes a habit. It is well worth the price.

One final word – no one is claiming a monopoly of knowledge or of excellence or suggesting that they are better than others or indeed that they have already attained to perfection in excellence. We, after all, are all works in progress. My job this morning is to provoke you to righteousness. It is however a fact that some of us have chosen this path and made a commitment to always pursue excellence, while recognising like Paul in Philippians 2:12- 14, that we should:

Not be self-satisfied
Press on or strain towards excellence
Lay hold on excellence
Forget the past because the good news is that you can start today on this journey
Be focused on the goal and;
Ultimately win the prize

May we receive the help of the Holy Spirit of God, the most excellent Spirit, to become all that God intended. And when we hit the finish line at the end of our journey, may we leave behind an enduring, positive impact in the lives of all we encounter and touch along that journey, and above all, may we be accepted by God. Amen.

Deaconess Obafunke Alade-Adeyefa writes from Lagos, Nigeria

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Are You Going Through Stormy Seas?

For anyone experiencing any storm in life, friendship, relationships, courtship and marriage…

I know that sometimes the pain is so intense, it is almost mind numbing. You do not understand how God can love you so much and yet, allow so much pain your way.

At that point, it looks like and feels like you can not carry that cross, you just can’t take it anymore and you are willing to throw that love away, you are willingly to remove your engagement or wedding ring and say ” I have had enough of this courtship, this marriage, this family! I just can’t take it anymore”.

Before you do, ask yourself? Have I prayed about this? I am not talking about you shedding tears or complaining about your would be spouse, spouse, relations to God, cussing them out and suggesting to God ways He can punish him/her/they on your behalf, No! I am talking about real praying.

Hold on, do you remember, His Word that says, He will not allow us more than we can bear? Please know this: God is a good and loving father who hates to see you in pain, however, HE allows some of these pain your way because He knows it will only make you more resilient, stronger and of a more refined breed.

In God’s design, this mind shattering pain is supposed to toughen you up, to make you stronger, to bring out the best in you not to destroy you. Therefore, please stop the nagging, complaining, arguing, exchange of hurtful words.

Pause, take quick breaths, then take slower calming breaths and if you can, remove yourself from the scene and when your peace is restored, go to God in prayer.

Thank Him for His Grace that has seen you through thus far. Thank Him for any good you can still find around you. Thank Him for any good you can still see in or around your spouse, family, relations.

Tell Him what is not working or what has gone terribly wrong. Tell Him the part you played or refused to play that somewhat contributed to the disintegration of the love, trust or peace in your home.

Tell God how the lack of love, trust, peace and perhaps the total coldness in your home, your life affects you negatively and how much you hurt . Please, be totally honest and vulnerable with God. He is The One Being that knows all your faults, mistakes and weaknesses and does not judge you. He is The One Being that knows all your secrets and does not gossip about you nor mock you with it.

Remember, regardless of whether you tell Him or not, He already knows, however, your going to Him with your problems and pain is for you to get a solution, an answer, a healing or perhaps, grace to forgive.

Therefore, please, go to God in prayer. If you have prayed before and received no previous answers, regardless of how many times that has happened, go back again and again and as many times until your answer comes.

Do you remember the story of the unrighteous judge in the bible, who the woman pestered until he attended to her case? Do you remember the lesson Jesus brought out through that tale? That if an unrighteous judge could hearken to the woman, because of her repeatedly going back to him for help, how much more will God not help us when we ask Him? Go back again and again and refuse to let God go until He solves it for you.

Please do not try to help God. There is no part of the scripture that says heaven helps those that help themselves and discard any counsel that takes you away from the counsel of God. Anything that will make you turn your back on God, run from because ultimately, that same “Solution” has a way of turning into your worst “Nightmare/pain”.

Therefore, run to Him, stay where He planted you and continue to serve Him in spite of the circumstance(s) around you. Pray and serve God and watch your answer come.

God knows how to order your steps to your salvation. He knows who to send to you, how he/she/they/it will locate you, how/when/where you two will meet or connect and how to pull you out of that stormy circle or calm the storm for you.

God will come through for you in Jesus name and those that hear your testimony will not only rejoice with you, but will also be blessed through your story in Jesus name, Amen!

Until next time, I love you with the love of God! Shalom!

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Rekindling The Flame In Your Marriage

Seeing new couples together can be very nice and interesting. The feeling of love is so evident in the way they talk, look at each other, smile and do things together. The laughter they have with each other leaves people around smiling at the joy love brings.

However, a common trend can now be observed, that after a while, the same couple now, snap at each other, can hardly ever get along again, can not smile not to talk of laugh without an effort, arguments replaces discussions and one begins to wonder where love has gone to.

Alot of times, both are busy pointing accusing finger at what the other is not doing. They try to correct what they think to be wrong via criticism and comparism. Then ego, silent treatment and mind games creep in. What this does is to kill the love flow and then gradually they start becoming strangers living in a particular place.

The question here is, why is there no sustainance of affection? why does the honey moon end afterwards?

The issue here is that both couple have allowed an important ingredient to vanish from their marriage relationship. The instrument of romance was the reason why before you married her, you felt so much connection and attraction.

You bought her gifts with precision and research. You always took your time to look at her with a ready compliment,you treat her and make her feel special everytime as much as you can and can afford. As the lady,when was the last time u were sweet to him? just cook him a lovely dinner or get him a gift u know he will love. Just look him in the eyes and tell him how much you love and appreciate him with a seal of a kiss ?

These were things you did freely and easily when you were dating buh as soon as you got married, formality became the other of the day. Everyone needs to be told that they are loved and not only in words but via action. the acting is the affirmation of the spoken word, so how can you affirm what is not there in the first place? Common words among warring couples that makes me laugh can be summarized via “he/she should know i love him/her because i do what am suppose to do”. What speaks love to people differ and you have to understand the love language of your partner. Once the love tank of your partner becomes empty, frustration comes in as agitation ensures.. one thing that is unhealthy among couples is bottled up emotions. When your partner does what you can not endure, lovingly tell them with reasons why it does not go down well with you.

Conversation is key because no matter how good a marriage relationship is, it is riddled with ups and downs and only via communication can both parties be on the same page and flow easily. So rather than bottle it up and die slowly, just find the best time and let it out in a loving way. Same words do have different effect when used differently.

So what do you do when your marriage is becoming more and more less affectionate? It is time to spice things up. Depending on how bad it is, you can always get things started but that is if both couples want to work it out truthfully and honestly.

In this context we are looking at a born-again couple who do not believe in divorce and understand the role of the person of the holyspirit in relationship building. After you have prayed, it is important you sit down and do something for each other, that up to this point has been neglected for so long.

Highlight your strong points, talk about the things that made you fall in love with that person to that person.

Have a no holds barred reflection on the things that made you tick as a couple, reminisce about the little nothings you did and then when the atmosphere is no more tensed talk about what has changed and how it has been affecting you. the objective is to listen closely and carefully, if possible have a note pad to show how serious you are with the details of your discussion. Communication rather than talking is what binds you two together.

Now, if you successfully pulled that off, you have commenced the recovery process.

Based on the listed things from your partner, you will now see areas that improvement is needed. If you feel the first stage is difficult then this is even more difficult, as it has to do with sacrifice for the other person.

The big question, which i believe everyone about saying ‘i do’ should critically ask themselves is, “Can i utterly sacrifice for my partner”?

Someone once said that “in every relationship/marriage that is thriving, someone is paying the price”. Just imagine if that price is shared in proportions and the burden split happily.

You have heard from your partner what they need improvement on and they would want some efforts towards addressing them. The sacrifice made will begin to feel their tanks and this is not the time to become the perfectionist or a fault finder but someone who will be a fan, cheering every move made.

However, prevention is always better than cure. Before the love tank gets drained, plan vacations for two, dinner for two. Let her just dress up and feel pretty and without the kids, go out to a function or date nights with you.

If you are the busy boss in the office, just as you can have a last minute meeting to save the company, you should always include family time in your schedule. Never get too busy to have quality time for your family and your partner in particular. Even if it is for an hour, make it count and take your leave seriously and religiously too- as that spells family time.

Feel free to comment or write us and we will bring more tips on how to put back that spice into your relationship.

Article submitted by Frank Odiaka Nwaeze.

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